Thursday, June 05, 2008

Urge to Kill

Ive been in another city, visiting with my father and stepmother. He had some minor surgery, no big deal, but when you're nearly 85, anything can seem like a big deal. And, he has an incredible flare for drama!

His surgery, normally outpatient, has meant an over-night stay for him. Thank you GOD! He is a terrible, incorrigible, grumpy, and very impatient, patient! He gets so needy and yet so demanding. When I'm around, he wants to do it all himself; when he has a hard time of it, it's all my fault. When a friend comes to visit, he's helpless, all of a sudden.

He has the innate skill to push all my buttons, jerk all my chains, rub everything the wrong way.

I'm proud of myself; all those years of therapy haven't been for naught. I did not kill him. In fact, I did very well.

I'm so glad to be home!


A Troll At Sea said...


Home is a good place to be.

Ur-spo said...

good for you!
this is what we call 'shaming them' or 'not stopping' or setting a good example"
they are not much satifaction I grant you, but a sign of beinga gentleman.

Lemuel said...

**calming ocean sounds**

We should get your father and my MIL together. The competition would be intense.

john said...

I think that most elderly react that way, especially because their lost of independence.

manxxman said...

"Joe" take a deep breath, you're home and you can deal with being you......and send up a small prayer for your stepmother.

Hirsute polyamorous bear said...


I'm flying home in about six hours after a four-day weekend on the beach with my folks, too. I've worked very hard to detach myself from the chains and buttons, and not let anyone rub me the wrong way this visit. So far, it's worked like a charm.

I love my folks, and I am beginning to see their foibles in more detached clarity. Sometimes. Last visit was not so sweet :-) ... I forgot myself and reacted instead of choosing my reactions and emotions. This time: better.

Just take deep, cleansing breaths.

But I will be glad to get on that plane ;-)

Donald said...

Father's Day approaches. The cards I sent my dad over the years are in a packet that my brother collected when he was cleaning out my parents' house to sell it. So I have the record of being a dutiful son. I might have wanted to be a more patient one.