Monday, July 25, 2011

More Better

Another doctor visit and two antibiotics have me feeling better.  Support and encouragement from friends have me being better, too.  Thanks.  Diverticulitis ain't no fun, I've come to discover.  I think I've been battling with this for quite some time, actually.  Only recently did it become so acute as to need some remedy.

Any illness can call us to re-evaluate some things.  And, of course (if you've been reading this blog) I'm always in the throes of something.  Up and down, and back and forth.

This week, I'm aiming to settle down a bit.  Calm the tummy, calm the spirit, be in touch with Spirit.  That will be the most calming, healing thing of all.  Why do I run so?  It is so simply and difficult - at the same time.

Things go well.  i am grateful.

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Belly ache

marching through my tummy
Ugh.  I've had a belly ache for at least a week.  Gets better, then worse.  I've been home most of the week.  Been to the doctor, had a CT scan - nothing.  I've spent a lot of money, though. A lot.

Money is one of the areas where I have the greatest fear.  I think I've written about all that before.  It seems any time I get a little ahead, I then move two steps back.

And I have fears of being ill.  Something wrong, really wrong.  But I know that probably not the case.  Just weather it, hang in, pray, relax, rest.

I guess I'm glad I'm the boss or someone would have fired me by now.

Friday, July 15, 2011

Clouds and Sun

Moving brings all kinds of stresses, re-assessments, acts of discernment, days of frustration, and opportunities for recycling.  And it can also be very depressing.  I am quite depressed today, anyway.  Be it moving or barometric pressure (and a cloudy, sun-less day), I've had a tough time getting moving.  But I am plodding, nonetheless.

Boxes: emptied, and still full; drawers not recently opened or explored; feeling a bit like a visitor in someone's home.  And yet making myself at home.  I need to focus on making it home.  And what that mans to me.

I've made an electronic connection with someone once in a situation like mine.  he's read back over old blog posts and made comments.  I went back and re-read some old posts.  Wow.  I wrote that stuff?  Could have fooled me.

And in other news, , , , , my last post ended with a "maybe."  It was intended to be a "may be;" not expressing uncertainty of connection, but wonderment about what may yet be.  It was indeed a very real connection.

And, I may have committed a terrible blogger-sin, or had a stroke of genius:  I told him about my blog, and sent him the link.  Hello, D.  are you there?  So now he has the opportunity to get to know me through what I've written.  And, (or but) I can't write all about him on my blog!  Yet, it's seemed the kind of intuitive connection that leads me to want him to know me better.  And there is so much history in this blog.  I really like him, but it's certainly more than a "like" kind of connection.  Who knows.  May be.  May it be.  What yet may be?

Monday, July 11, 2011

On the Journey

My laptop is still out, but I've come up with a desk top for home, for now.  It's good to stay connected.

Check out a new brother on the journey  Give him support and wisdom.

I attended this weekend a local celebration for two men who were married (yes, married) in DC in April.  It was a wonderful experience.  One of them has been for years involved in theatre and music.  So, it was a sumptuous, musical feast, with a little religious stuff in there, too.

I was quite moved by the event - and I hadn't expected to be.  Yes.  It's possible, it's happening, our world is changing, albeit slower than we'd like.  Also, I was moved to think of possibilities for my own life, too.  One day.  One day . . . .

And, in other news, I met someone at said wedding celebration.  Sadly, he lives far away.  But the connection was quite real.  Maybe.

Friday, July 08, 2011

Electron Death

It seems my computer has died, or (at least) is very ill.  So, I'll be off-line for a time.  Hopefully, it will not be a time, a time, and a half time, but one never knows.  At least my gmail account(s) will work.  But not my work email.  Aw, shucks.

There are many other things I cannot do while computer-less.  But life goes on.  Ugh.

Thursday, July 07, 2011

Unpacking . . . . .

before the onslaught of boxes . . .
Living in a home that was home to others is an interesting task.  Some of their stuff.  Some of mine.  Sorting, deciding, re-arranging . . . . it goes on.

What to keep, what to throw, what to move, what to sort: decisions galore.  And it can be overwhelming at times.  Of course, I can be easily overwhelmed.  And, with enough floor space, we can put off decision making till tomorrow.  After all, tomorrow is another day. (Thanks, Scarlett).

I'm getting things sorted, but not me.  I've got some sorting I need to do, too.  But that will come.  I've been living with others for over two years.  This being alone is a new thing.  I don't like changes. And I miss my friends.

In other news . . . .

I have managed a date now and then, even amongst the busy-ness of everything.  There are some really nice guys out there.  I hope one will find me.  And I, him.  If I can find the time.