When asked once if I “had a plan,” I answered, “Oh, hell. I don’t even have a clue!” That’s me all over. As Thomas Merton wrote in his famous prayer, "O Lord, I do not know where I am going." But I know I am not alone. Sometimes I may feel like it, but I am not.
I had promised myself I would wait through the holidays before moving very far ahead on the great coming out plan. Well, the holidays are over. Back in December I made an appointment with my boss. He really isn’t my direct “boss” but sort of the regional executive. He is a very good man, and I believe he will be open and affirming of me. I hope.
The meeting is tomorrow (Wednesday, 01/04/06). Prayers, please.
Bringing him in to this picture is risky but necessary. I need support, and I may need to “put in for a transfer.” Some counsel will be helpful as to where to go next, figuratively speaking, but perhaps literally, as well. But what if he flips out, what if he tries to get me fired, what if he ends my career? What if , what if.
Please God, give me serenity to accept, courage to change, wisdom to discern.
The picture is actually a photograph of a billboard in Durham, England, advertising a movie about Durham, St. Cuthbert, and Lindisfarne. This picture has become a sort of icon for me, as my sacred journey had strong beginnings in the summer of '04 when my family and I traveled in the UK. Also, I like the very bearish viking!
More about that sacred beginning another time.
Grace & Peace, Joe.