Wednesday, November 04, 2009

BearToast Explains it all

I've said in my profile that folk should feel free to ask me questions.  A few have.  I might have responded directly to them but don't have their emails.  So here it is.

Steve at the Helpful Elephant asked some questions in some comments.  
  • Is the reason you don't have photos of your face because you're afraid of being 'out', even on a blog?  Do you think you're unattractive? Or is it for a more practical reason? Like...You don't want weirdo's to be able to know you for...weird reasons...???
I've not shown my face on the blog for fear (yes, it's fear) of being outed.  I could lose my job, and maybe a lot more.  I long to be completely open, but that's just not where I am yet.  I don't think I'm unattractive, and I know that I'm not exceptionally attractive.  I'm becoming more and more comfortable with me: who I am, and how I look.  I'll send you a picture, if you want.
  • You mentioned you didn't have birthday parties when you were a kid. How come?
My mother has been dead for six years now, you might have needed to ask her.  Our family did not have much money and there was too much dysfunction going around.  I think my mom was too focused on helping other people to notice my brothers or me too much.  And, I was always a good boy, trying very hard never to get in the way.

  • Who's taking the photo's of you in each shot? For example, the one on the beach or the recent one of you looking out into the ranges...
The beach photos were taken by one of my daughters.  The shot of me in the mountains was done by using the timer on the camera.  Lucky shot, actually.

I'll answer some other questions in another post.  Keep them coming.  I'm glad to answer what I can.  I do appreciate email addresses, though.  If you'd prefer an answer directly to you or if you'd like me to post on it, let me know.

I don't know that I'm really that interesting, but I can be creative!


JON said...

I wish you all the best. Thanks for the posts.

I am a bit older than you. Also live in the South at this time.

I never have fully understood why "coming out" was such a big thing for some gay men-women. I understand the need on some levels and totally do not on others.

But I do wish you the best and am hopeful that your "coming out" will be a plus in your live.

Lemuel said...

Au contraire, mon frere! :) You are both attractive and interesting!

As for bd parties, I was told early that I could have two for reasons similar to those you mention. I had one at five and one at nine.

Neil said...

You seem to be pretty focused on the coming out process and that's understood at the present stage of your life. But sooner or later you'll see that this question isn't the most important one. To me, it's much more important to know how to be a good person (regardless of sexuality), how to be a good friend, etc.

Jeff said...

I can vouch that Joe is attractive *and* sexy.

Being congruent with one's inner self is important.

Love you, big guy :-)

BadgerBear said...

Um ... That last one was me (from husband's iPhone)

Dyl said...

Can I be shallow and say anyone with calves like that can't be unattractive ;-) . Keep well.