Sunday, February 15, 2009

Wisdom to know the difference

I'm challenged in the "planning ahead" department. Or, as my dear departed mother would say, I can't pour piss out of a boot with instructions on the heel.

So, for my big trip to NYC, I had not done the research and made definite plans to do X, Y, or Z. Not having things planned out, and arriving in the big city, I started to go over the edge.

Oh, I'm not frightened or intimidated by the City (well, not too much). I can use subways fairly well, which I did. I can handle crowds. And, it comes in handy being rather large and ugly, giving off a "don't mess with me" sort of air.
Thinking about what I should have done, the plans I should have made, the thinking and packing I should have thought about, I plunged into shame and self-doubt. It it goes downhill from there.

But I didn't let it happen. I got it together. Knowing I didn't have time to see "everything," I got real. I decided to go with what I could do and not sink into the morass of blame and shame about what I could not do. A real life example of finding serenity to accept what I could not change, the courage to do what I could. For once, I had the wisdom to know the difference.

14 comments:

Ur-spo said...

I am glad you got into the right space; all those could haves were making my eyes cross!

Ultra Dave said...

Good for you! Whenever I go somewhere, I have the same problem. Never prepared enough, time enough, money enough. I just do what I can when I can and enjoy myself none the less.

Lemuel said...

Excellent! FWIW, there is *never* enough time - no matter how well you plan - to do *everything* in the City, even looking at a microcosm (such as "gay things") of such. I've learned that you need to be selective - or better yet - go with the moment and enjoy who, what, and where you are at any given time.

Think of your visit as an appetizer that only prepares you for the next of many courses.

Tobey said...

I have always wanted to go to NYC but I know Iw ould be overwhelmed with going...lol...sounds like you took the right approach.

A Troll At Sea said...

Toast-Man:

I love your mother's remark about the boot--I will have to remember that one.

My grandfather-in-law used to describe things as "shaking like a dog passing peach pits." Ah, the wonders of Southern language!

T@C

Steven said...

Glad to hear that you kept everything in perspective and were able to enjoy your trip rather than not.

By the way, since when are you ugly?

Topper said...

This was a very significant trip for you in more than one way! think of it as doing not only what you could do, but what was important and you did know the difference. You ARE moving to abundance in many ways. Oh maybe big but not ugly!

Jeremiah Andrews said...

You went to the Big Apple and you didn't have a plan? What kind of Gay Man are you??? You silly man. We need to get you a personal assistant to make sure you are prepared for road trips - I will Gladly apply for the position.

You make me laugh out loud. If you went once, you will go again. And next time you will be better prepared.

Love you

Jeremy

Neil said...

"finding serenity to accept what I could not change, the courage to do what I could" - that's a lesson for me.

RG said...

Plan what you can, improvise when you must.

Ray's Cowboy said...

Just found your blog. have a safe trip.
Ray

BentonQuest said...

Big cheers! You are farther along the road than I may ever be. You have reached role-model status! ;-)

David said...

Coming out after 15 years of marriage taught me that living in regret, for things big or small, or dwelling on could haves or might haves just keeps me stuck in the past and I miss my present. The now is what we have and I'm glad you enjoyed your now so very much!!

john said...

I hope that you had fun!!