Ah, we move toward the holiday season! Time with family and friends . . . . . . well, with family, anyway. This will be a truly weird year for me.
My wife and I have resigned ourselves to my moving out after the first of the year. No time-table has been set, and there is the possibility of my being able to engineer a job transfer to a nearby town. That would leave me close enough to stay in touch but living on my own. With a high school sophomore in the house, I want to be very close and involved.
For the last ten years, my family (wife, kids) have gathered with my wife's family for the holiday. It has been an important family time and a wonderful experience. I trust this year will be no different. But this will, most likely, be my last year with them. My last year in my present "role", anyway.
This is all so weird. I started this post before the holiday, and now it is the day after. More than ever, I have that feeling of "not fitting in."
From a few posts back: In an earlier post, I wrote about wanting to be out and to be with other gay men. Comments from several folk gave gentle admonishment about segregating myself from the straight world. They were so right. Now, with all of this newness and the glow of a familiarity that seems so unfamiliar, I want to "immerse" myself in "gay". When I come to my senses a bit more, I know in my soul that gathering with a whole, diverse, welcoming, caring, challenging community of folk is what I long for most.
I am very thankful for so many things. Particularly, I want to thank so many of you who have supported me in this journey. The alone-ness isn't so lonely. Thank you!
Cheers, dears, Joe.